I've retired from belly dancing - I thought you should know.
I've decided it's time to hang up the ol' coined skirt and veil. I just can't do it anymore, and you're going to have be OK with that.
Sure, it's fun to talk about (and maybe it was fun to read about), but just because something is fun or interesting is not a reason to hold on to it. I will have to find a new exercise endeavor to blog about.
During my second to last class I was SO frustrated. Everything was OK and I felt like I wasn't a complete dork, but then? Then she added VEILS. Or, to put in terms my theater people can relate to, she added a prop! How dare she! I. was. LOST. It's like I was OK and dancing and shaking it and following and then she adds the veil and I'm all, "Feet no work good! Music so loud! Need rest now!" And I fell down.
OK. Not really. I didn't actually fall down. But I just couldn't even attempt to follow her anymore! It was the VEIL! I actually just threw it down and quit trying to use it. It was awful. It's as if I became instantaneously stupid. And I hated it. And I didn't want to go back even though I only had one class left.
But I did go back.
So my last class I was sooo concerned about the veil. But I told myself to just suck it up and do it since it was my last class. And she's a really great teacher and seems like a super nice person and I thought it would be rude of me to come to her class with a bad attitude. So I mustered up what little energy I had at that point in the day and went with it. And she got the veils out first thing! EEK! But, dude, let me tell you - I totally rocked the veil. That doesn't make any sense, but I did. I was turning and flipping it and whipping it around - totally rocked it. Totally. But then we were done with the veils and I still had the rest of the class to deal with.
Since it was my last class, I decided to do something daring: I watched the other people in the class. And I have to tell you something... they looked as dorky as I felt! They didn't have any more rhythm or ability than I did! It was awesome! Believe me, I am not trying to insult the other ladies in the class, it's just that I've always been so focused on what I was trying to do that I had never noticed that before. It's like I had a belly dancing "aha" moment.
Perspective really is everything, isn't it?
Regardless of my enlightenment, I am done with belly dancing. It's time to move on to another activity. Belly dancing is very "yang" and I need something a little more "yin" in my life.
I don't exactly have a plan at this point, but I am considering a more solitary activity... maybe on a treadmill... maybe I will take up - dare I say it? - RUNNING. Hmmm....